(in honor of the Great Work)
Did I not go forth from the temple
and call to the winds to carry my spirit
out among the clouds?
Flying, I knew the Clouds
were not the lofty palace of my desire,
And I fell into the darkness of the abyss,
screaming and wailing,
In utter destruction did I fall
until my voice was reft away
and my body was dissolved
in the acid vats of heaven.
I am unmade.
I am nothingness.
A light appears
I am falling incuriously into the light,
and find the soul of the sun,
strong and warm and filled with love,
This is not enough,
that the soul of the sun and my soul should be one.
Again I fall, reaching,
I fall and am annihilated .
The weak and the sorrowing
and the cowardly and the meek,
these are destroyed.
Each turning is illumined
by the doom crackling
in the unworthy places of my heart,
And my heart is torn open
so that these unworthy ones might be stricken.
I am the shrike that flies out into the morning
and attacks without mercy.
The trembling creature that hides and runs is my prey,
I will smite it and rend it and devour it,
bones and blood,
and there is an ache in my belly.
The ache passes and I hunt.
I am the virgin in the sanctuary,
eager to dance and to cast away the veils and jewels.
I lie longing at the feet of the king and the queen
who watch from the double throne.
I am for the king and the queen,
For their pleasure and delight
and I have waited in all joy for this night.
I will be forever virgin,
for the passion and the pain are ever new.
I am ever young and filled with longing.
I am a woman
I stand upon the field of battle
laughing as I wade in the blood of my enemies.
I need no one to save me,
nor defend me,
for I am mighty in the work of the sword.
I have built my house
with the skulls of the conquered,
with my own sweat have I built my mansion.
I have purchased my fields with my blood
and therein are the grains I have planted
and I have harvested,
There is no other to plant these seeds,
nor harvest this grain,
It is my will that this should be.
I have burned my house to the ground
and threshed the grain
to bake bread for my journey.
I have set my back to the foundations,
blackened and ruined
I have taken the road
leading away unto the stars.
I have eaten the bread
and felt the ache in my belly.
My skin is shriveled
my bones are broken,
for I have no need of bones,
Dancing, I have come unto the stars
In the emptiness,
I have heard the voice of my beloved,
and I am bidden to shatter myself upon the stones
at the foot of the cliffs of the abyss.
I throw myself from the cliffs,
for the sake of my love,
and I am shattered.
I am lifted from the stones,
and soar bodiless with my beloved,
and she had shown to me the road
and the purpose.
I shout with gladness.
Harsh is the road, and lovely,
it is straight upon the stars,
and it turns and twists upon the ground,
and it is hidden from the sight of the profane,
and I am made pure thereby.
I walk with gladness,
joy at the dawn
joy at the sunset
joy at the midnight's blazing stars.
I weary not, nor sleep unknowing.
And I need none other than my beloved,
and she walks beside me and within me.
Shall I not seek my beloved in the darkness,
and in the silence?
Will she not answer my yearning
with the breath of her kisses?
I am filled,
I am destroyed,
I am created new.
Tear out my throat and feast upon my blood
that is sweet and thick and hot
and slowly burns upon your lips
Writhing and gasping in an agony of uttermost pleasure,
I am slain by the scourge of fire and ice.
My breath is ripped from my body,
and becomes your breath,
stained and reeking,
The blood of eternity
and the reek of a thousand funeral pyres.
I see the hideous face of God,
And run shrieking with terror and desire,
But the god has found me,
and with his horn has pierced me.
I am split apart
and lie bleeding and panting
upon the damp grass of the primordial forest.
I am dying,
my blood glitters like garnets in the morning sun,
and at night the blood gushes black upon the tender flowers
and they grow strong and lush
God has slain me, and she has removed her mask
And she is dancing on the dead,
wreathed round her waist with skulls.
She is grown fat on the blood of her children
as it pours down her pendulous breasts
and mingles with the birth blood of the universe,
that flows from her purple lips.
She had closed me within the palm of her hand,
and shredded my belly with her claws of mirrored steel,
she feasts upon my entrails,
and laughs at my pain and horror.
She has cast away her blackened body
And I see that he is the radiance of the quiet stars,
And his voice is the wail of the infant sacrifice,
And his crown is the sun and the moon
And his eyes are black and unfathomed
And in them are reflected
All of the tears of all the gods
Crying, he has cast away his crown
And I behold my heart
And I am infinite and unknown
Entranced and entrancing
And I tear the throat from my servant
And am drunk on her blood,
For I have ripped away the chains binding her tormented flesh.
And together we shall drink the blood of gods